My former husband will never admit this in public, but privately he refers to me as a dingbat. Dingbat definitions from 1800’s are varied from an alcoholic drink to male genitalia, but more recently describe a stupid, eccentric or foolish person like Edith [All in the Family] or Lisa [Friends]. When I found this out I was like, yeah, well you married me and we were together for 22 years. We raised two kids and did amazing things. Your loss.
I wasn’t crushed like I would have been 10 years ago. I wasn’t worried about the impact on our children. They are grown and set in their opinions of us, both good and bad. I was curious, though, and found the word dingbat in typography is an ornament, character or spacer used in typesetting. Okay, I can work with that. Dingbat is also associated with an architectural style described as “two-story apartment buildings featuring cheap rent and fancy names that promise the good life, but never deliver.” That is probably what my ex was going for.
To hell with that and getting back to my eight year old self, I’d like to think I’m more whimsical like the Hansel character from Zoolander. I’m so hot. I can be interesting and sometimes frustrating, but lovable nonetheless.
My little sister says, I can’t land the plane. My older sister says, Alison, you are always onto the next cool thing. What’s true is that I have, more or less, always been this way. I am driven by an current unseen in life by most and appreciate you, my friends and family for sticking with me.
I mean, hey, no one is perfect.